I keep getting the feeling that I should be capturing this moment, this experience. I’ve never done anything so daring in the name of romance and possibly love. I’m nervous as heck. The butterflies in my stomach seem drunk. Fluttering about in all different directions. But among the chaos I still feel a sense of peace and calm. I trust him with my safety and dare I say heart? So here I am embarking on this new journey, adventure. I don’t know where this will lead but I want these words to frame this moment in time. Who knows, maybe I’ll be reading this to our kids one day.
I fear thunderstorms because of
the unpredictable noise and chaos.
I also fear the aftermath…
Fresh starts, new beginnings.
Last night I experienced a thunderstorm.
haven’t felt them in quite some time
Found myself continuously sabotaging
potential relationships simply because
I compared them all to you.
I yearned for the authentic chemistry we shared
minus the infidelity.
Realized at some point I’d have to master your trade
and no longer consider your feelings
as you so easily did with mine.
Your words always drew me back in
But your unwavering actions has led me astray.
Well I found that chemistry we once shared in another
I forgot how beautiful the feeling was, is..
Now I’m basking in the warmth and joy
of something we once shared.
Don’t pick me.
Water me, adore me, care for me
Admire me, love me, touch me
Stroke me, hold me momentarily
Now let go, before you hurt me.
I crave it! Feen for it even. I tend to physically, emotionally and verbally express myself in all aspects with use of every emotion. When upset… I may cry, furrow my eye brows or become reclusive and quiet. When I’m happy…I grin from ear to ear, dance to my favorite song in the mirror over and over or pray a thankful prayer. When in love or even in like… I express it down to the very core of the woman I am. I will use any endearing term or phrase that organically escapes my lips, use these same lips to plant kisses over and over and all over, nurture, cook, dance for him…please him.
So what’s a girl to do when her affection is stifled or shunned…